I love getting positive emails from people, it makes my day! I decided to do an “Advice Column” where I randomly pick my favorite emails and respond to them. Here’s one that I decided to post:

Email from Ronnie:
hey hunni! love your blog. I’ve been trying to get opinions from asian girls who’ve done the brazilian blowout thing. Wanted to see if you thought it was worth the money? I understand why curly hair girls would get it but i odn’t want to waste money since my hair is already straight (just flat… ugh.)

thanks.

My Answer:
Hi Ronnie!  Yeah I’ve gotten it done twice. The first time I did it, it was beautiful and was really worth the money. It made my hair soft, shiny, and smooth and cut the blow-drying time in half! BUT, I didn’t use the recommended products and even though I used sulfate-free shampoo, it still stripped the Brazilian out.

Then I re-did my Brazilian. The second time I did the Brazilian, it wasn’t as healthy looking but it was still frizz-free. (Probably because I did it only 3 weeks after the first Brazilian.) I used the Brazilian products and it definitely helped prolong the Brazilian treatment.

Overall, I would recommend getting the Brazilian Blowout ONLY if you have problems with frizzy hair that takes a while to blow dry. If your hair is already relaxed and shiny, I don’t really think you would need it. It’s a very mild treatment that is most effective when the frizz/damage in your hair is obvious and visible. If you have healthy hair already, nah don’t bother with it. But the products are amazing! Especially the Brazilian masque. I don’t have the Brazilian in my hair anymore and I still use the masque twice a week! Leave it in your hair for 20 minutes and your hair will be SOOO silky! I think you should just start off with the products and see how you like it.

Hope this helped! P.S. Here is a picture of my hair after doing the Brazilian. (My hair is usually pretty wavy, frizzy, dry and VERY damaged from color) The Brazilian did make my hair a lot healthier, I admit.

xoxo Hunni

This is going to be a long ass rant. Really did some soul-searching.

Back when I was in high school, I was labeled “conceited,” a “bitch,” or even a “whore,” even though people didn’t really know me. (How could I be a whore when I didn’t really have any boyfriends? Go figure.) Being young and naive, my reputation was my life and I didn’t think there was anything worse than having a bad rep. I tried so hard to be nauseatingly sweet to everyone and in my whole entire life, I went out of my way to please people so they would like me and know that I’m not as mean as I look. Now that I’m all grown up (well sorta) and have a stronger mind, I rarely hear those negative terms that used to make my life a living hell. (Whew.)

But I’m afraid all those years of trying to be sweet and nice has gotten me in even more trouble. I transformed and became something that was even worse than appearing like a “bitch.” I became a doormat.

It took me a long time to realize why I was always stuck in such awkward situations or why my life literally seems like a constant drama series. I’ve been wondering why all these bad things happen and after asking around, some people would tell me it’s because I interpret them as bad things and I totally agree with that. But you know what else? When you’re too nice…people literally will step all over you. I know it sounds commonsensical and obvious but you would think that when you’re nice, you can inspire people and you can make a difference. You can change perceptions and motivate peace.

Wrong, so awfully wrong. Sure there are a good handful of people that will appreciate you for being nice and treat you the way you treat them. But I was not aware of how many bad people there are in the world. Bad people who not only will hate you for being too nice but who will also try to use your niceness to their advantage. I’ve always watched movies where the nice guys persevere and overcome dumb mean people but in reality, that doesn’t always happen. Sadly, I think it’s just to give the good guys hope.

Then I started wondering how I became so nice in the first place…maybe it’s from years of watching goody-goody shows like “Family Matters,” or “Full House,” where the people are unrealistically nice and everyone seems to overcome issues by “talking it out.” Maybe I pictured the world to be like that when I was younger and expected I would walk into my first day of school with everyone waving and saying hi to me. But the world is definitely not like that. Far from it.

I guess I just noticed all of this working in a prominently female workplace. You learn a lot when you’re caged in together with members of your species. I learned about all types of females. I actually learned a lot about myself in the process. I learned that there aren’t people as “good” and “nice” as you. (I put that in quotes because it’s very subjective.) I also learned that if you want to be as happy as possible, you have to cut out the people and the things in your life that give you even a little bit of grief. Because it’s not healthy to do that to yourself. And you have to do so in a way without feeling sorry for what you did. You can’t feel sorry for the things that are harmful to you.

I have learned what it is to make yourself happy and trust me, it is hard. It’s not an easy thing to do. You can still be nice and optimistic but you have to be smart about it and careful. I’ve learned to read people quite well after a few times of meeting them, but sometimes people can still surprise you. So I will still try to continue believing in those traditional movies and t.v. shows and prove that yes, nice gals can finish first. As long as you make yourself happy, then why do you care about others? It only makes them miserable in the end if you don’t care too much.

Well I’m out for the day…sorry about the long depressing post.

Wait a minute, you know what? I’m NOT sorry! You read it, that’s on you!

xoxo Hunni

We’ve all encountered a bitch at least once in our lives. As harsh as the description “bitch,” sounds, you can’t deny that for some people, it’s quite an accurate label.

You know the kind: bullies, evil dictators, and Type A personality mixed with eccentricities. 

Until recently, I had no idea how to deal with these difficult people. I literally took it personally, acted on emotions and took it to heart. I learned very recently how to handle these people in a firm, mature way and most importantly, how to be at peace with yourself.

Here are some tips I’ve put together just from years of hearing advice and also learning on my own.

1. Silence is truly the best weapon.

Sometimes being quiet is stronger than a comeback. If you do it in an assertive way, it can work. And yes there are different ways of being silent. You can be silent in a victimized way which looks like you have no comeback, or you can be silent in a strong assertive way …kind of like a manager staring silently at an employee who just made a stupid mistake. It’s all in your demeanor.

Silence can also save you from acting on emotions and saying something weak and defensive. Most of the time, it’s the easiest, quickest option and saves yourself from embarrassment if you do accidentally say the wrong thing.

2. Stand your ground. 

Don’t let them guilt-trip you. Just tell yourself: It’s not your fault and you didn’t do anything wrong. Keep this thought in the back of your head. If you’re a genuinely good person and you didn’t do any wrongdoings intentionally, how can anybody blame you? It’s not your intent to hurt anybody and guess what: All humans make mistakes. So there’s no reason for someone to hold it against you.

If you feel even an ounce of guilt, you will always find yourself catering to this person. But always think of yourself in a confident manner and know that you are a good person.

3. Don’t try to change them. 

Never expect people to do a 180. Focusing all your energy on their negatives only causes more internal frustration if it doesn’t work. People don’t change easily and it’s not your duty to help them. The best thing to do for yourself is know how they are and work on the way you interpret everything. Don’t dwell on changing their ways; just concentrate on your reactions and perceptions. They are not worth your time and energy, but your sanity is!

4. Erase them from your memory. 

For most people, this is probably the hardest step. But it can be done, trust me. New hobbies and new interests can take your mind off of many things. There are so many opportunities available nowadays. If writing is your thing, you could maybe start a blog or keep a private journal. You can join a club, take up a sport, or even play games online. I even know someone that likes to tidy up the house and clean to keep her mind off things. It can be as simple as that! Keeping good thoughts in your mind and having good people around you will make a difference!

5. Abandon Awkwardness. 

Some people might find themselves to be shyer or more quiet around the person. But don’t stray away from them. Face your fears. Act like there’s nothing absolutely wrong and treat them as if nothing they do or say bothers you. The more you practice this, the more stronger your mentality will be and before you know it, you’ll start to believe it! Trust me, this little tip works! 

Avoiding them only causes you stress and gives them more leeway to continue what they’re doing. You want them to see you’re strong and can maturely handle anything that comes your way. You’re not a kid and you shouldn’t have to deal with such a childish situation.

6. Be an actor! 

It honestly helps to take yourself outside the situation and observe from a third-person point of view. Just step outside of yourself and pretend you’re watching the whole thing as if it’s one of your favorite sitcoms. You can see the situation under a funny light. Why is this person yelling at you when it doesn’t concern them? What a nosey jerk! It helps when you pretend you’re watching it happen to someone else because you won’t be as sensitive and you’ll be able to see how silly and minor the whole thing is.

Follow these tips and you’ll feel better in no time!

xoxo Hunni

Yes, we’ve all been through it. Those annoying, tricky, diabolical questions that have us all fuddled. In today’s tough economy, standing out in job interviews is crucial. You need to do whatever you can to not let the job slip away, and yes that means, attempting to answer these tough questions that make us cringe…

I’ve been doing a lot of research on the toughest interview questions that we oh-so-love to hear and here are some answers I think would work well. Oh the questions we dread…

1. Why do you want to work for this company?

OPTION A: Here is when you really want to do research on the company. (If the thought of researching the company and reading all the long details are too stressful for you, then choose another occupation because obviously, this job doesn’t hold your interest and if you can’t read a few pages about this job, then what makes you think you can work there?) So find out the info. and incorporate it in your answer. It really makes you look knowledgeable and it impresses them when you actually know a thing or two about their company and what they do. 

OPTION B: Mentioning your past experience can also help. If you’re applying for a receptionist position, you can throw in: With my three years experience of being a receptionist, I feel that all the knowledge I’ve gained from the company can really help aid your company. etc. etc.
You can get really creative with this and you definitely want to try to mix Option A with Option B together. If you mention their company, don’t forget to mention what you can do for their company and back-up your debate with experience examples.

2. What is your biggest weakness?

 Now I’ve never been asked this question in an interview and hopefully you won’t have to. But there’s a chance you might. Nowadays, the top answers to avoid are: I’m a perfectionist or I’m such a hard worker. Because honestly, that’s not a weakness and it’s such a bullshit way to get around the answer. Interviewers are not robots. They’re not stupid. They can sense when someone is not being truthful. 

The reason why they’re even asking you is because they expect someone who can:

A. Name a reasonable, yet minor flaw. (This shows how honest you are, but not stupid enough to give a major flaw)
B. Give an example of how they struggled with the flaw in previous work experience. (This shows that you are rational and you are willing to admit your mistakes)
C. Shown how they have overcome the flaw and have grown. (This shows that you are a mature person who can make a mistake, own up to it, and create a resolution to solve it.)

Telling them a genuine mistake you’ve made but then telling them that you’ve resolved it shows a lot of character about you. You know humans make mistakes, but you’ve fixed your ways. Try something simple like, “I’ve always been introverted but in my last job, I was able to give a lecture to an entire classroom, etc.” Let them know what you’ve done to fix that problem and make sure to not give a problem that is not fixable like “I’m always tardy.”

3. What is your salary expectation?

RESEARCH! Go to Salary.com and find out what your job is normally paid. In this economy, I feel that most of the time, the salary is a lot higher than usual, so try to get a feel of the company to get an idea of how much they pay. You can ask other people you know with similar jobs too.

OPTION A: Once you’ve found out, the best way to answer this is: 
I would expect my salary to be equal to my contributions and since I am confident I can contribute significantly to your company, I feel that asking for [insert amount here] is reasonable. 

Or you can say anything along the lines of that. Or another way you can go is this:

OPTION B: You can mention the considerable amount of experience you have, mention a bachelor’s degree or any experience of relevance and importance, and that will help them consider a higher salary based on your experience. Internships, special classes, and volunteer work count too!

OPTION C: You can also mention why you’re better than other candidates. Maybe you’re available on call and you can fill in for someone’s shift or you’re available when someone is out sick. Or maybe you have a ton of experience in that certain field. Or maybe you’ve done something creative that made you stand out from the rest. Be competitive!

4. Where do you see yourself in 5 years?

I’ve heard by doing research online that people have actually answered, “One day I want to manage my own company,” or “Have a business in fashion, etc.” No no no. This one’s actually simple. Even if you want the job temporarily, always always assume that the company wants you for the long run. They don’t want someone who’s just going to ditch them after a couple of months, they want someone who is really dedicated in helping the company grow. So to be safe, just say, “I would still like to be progressing within the company and hopefully one day be promoted to a higher position.” Always relate this question to the company and you’ll be good.

Well hope these tips help. Let me know if you have any other questions and I’ll be sure to add them!

xoxo Hunni